Off-Topic Fridays: What's Your Dream Job?

As requested by @JayJay, Off-Topic Fridays is back!

Personally, I love the idea of being an Ethical Hacker. But I’m not smart enough, so you’re stuck with me, Fatshark. :slightly_smiling_face:

What would you choose, if you do anything you wanted for a living?


Thanks. :hugs:
Uhhhh, that’s a good one!

I don’t know if there’s an official name for it in english, but some sort of social worker/educational technician-mix is the closest i found as a translation.

Thing is you have to fund the state certification (it’s basically internship for a couple of years) yourself, and you only get government support until a certain age (which i’m over), so i’m stuck with baseline work at a supermarket at the moment, but i’m working on it. :smile:


I work contracted for visual design right now, but I really want to do something in community or influencer management for brands (in the gaming sphere or otherwise); but I’m still working on learning how to utilize interaction and progress metric analysis in order to be better well-rounded.

If not that, I want to do SEO. We have a local firm here that specializes in that stuff, so been hoping for an opening there soon as well. :slight_smile:


Professional beer drinker. I’m willing to take one for the team and overlook the potential health risks. It’s a tough job, but someone has got to do it.


If I was to drop my duties at the White Tower… I guess Lothern Sea Guard. I always loved the navy, and Lothern is a beautiful place.
Hm, maybe a commander at the Eagle Gate.

Galri Asur


I really want to learn to fly and somehow make money from that.

I guess you might say “Professional Pilot”.


Oh, I assumed you meant like batboy or something.

For me . . . professional author or a nurse. I mean, I am a published author, but I haven’t been able to make it my job yet. As for nursing, well, I enjoy helping people, but I don’t want to be a doctor.


That’s a difficult question to answer, as I’d really have to try out a lot of things, more than I’ll ever have time or ability for. Trying to stay realistic makes things a bit more difficult, too, as there are thing that’d be interesting but I know that I could never really do, because of either psychological or physical reasons.

But of the things I can actually think of… Yeah, I guess I’d like to get involved in making games. Problem is, I don’t have any credentials (and for a couple of reasons can’t really produce any, either) and my only relevant skills would be in the design side, and maybe a bit of writing. Not really enough to get started in a small project (and because of the lack of credentials, no real chance of getting recruited in a project that could use those alone).

Then again, my current job, while wildly different, isn’t far from being a “dream job” for me either. I’m trained as a youth and leisure instructor and the job matches that, and I’ve found that I really like working with kids. There are difficult cases and difficult days, but I do like it. Just about the only thing that could make it better is if it were full-time - less free time that way, true, and I’d have to wake up earlier most likely, but it’d also mean a bit more money and me feeling better about myself.


I am 21 so there will be other wishes coming, but here it goes: The IT guy with as many barricades between me and the End-Users as possible.
I would love to become an Expert in UNIX-based operating systems and Virtual Infrastructure by VMWare.

Right now, I have a bit too much contact with end-users. But I already am responsible for the virtual infrastructe but still aquire help of external service providers. I am also tapping into Firewall-Security. Sadly the only servers which are UNIX-based are Appliances. Which I don’t dare to touch.

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I’ve got it. I’ve been a chef my whole career and love every minute.

I’m semi-retired now though, but up until 2015 I had worked every Christmas Day, Boxing Day, New Years Eve, My Own Birthday, My Wife’s birthday(If it fell at the weekend) and Every Bank Holiday Weekend. Every Saturday night and Sunday Lunch for roughly 20 years. I’m one of the Marco-Pierre white generation of Chefs who thinks 70-80 hours a week is fine and anyone who can’t do it isn’t worthy of the badge. I loved it. I also drink far more than the UK government think is acceptable. Oh well.

What happened is this - I managed to convince the best woman I’d ever met to marry me and as a result of imbibing alcohol and a back rub or two we are lucky enough to have produced some brand new people.

Those Children fundamentally change everything and being able to do 200 wedding meals in the ballroom to a high standard doesn’t mean sh*t if you’re not there to spend time with the brand new people you helped make. I still cook, but it’s in a School, and I get all the School holidays off to spend with my kids. They’re 10,12 and 14 and I’m having a riot saying “Ok Boomer” to everything they ask me.

I am the quintessential cringy dad and it’s brilliant.

TL;DR. Your dream job goes out of the window when you find your dream life.


I know Stella Artois have an officially recognised Beer Sommelier, with the same qualifications as a wine sommelier. I suspect he doesn’t just get to down pints at work and toddle off home though.

The show Mythbusters did an episode where they got a really cheap nasty vodka and put it through a Britta water Filter. They put the Vodka through once, then twice, then three times etc.

Then they lined up ten glasses with the first being the unfiltered Voddy and the last being put through the filter ten times.

then they shuffled them up .

then they gave them to the professional Vodka taster for something like Grey Goose Vodka, and he put them back in order just based on how they tasted. That’s some seriously sensetive palette right there.

I taste Vodka, I almost Vomit. IT is designed by Nurgle to make people chunder.


Omg. Vodka is made to get drunk, not to taste it. Cool it down to 1-2 C degrees, drink in one gulp and have a bite or juice drink)))

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A dream should be unattainable, no? In the afternoon he is an ordinary journalist, but in the evening he is a multi-billionaire



An unrealistic dream may be unattainable, but to decide which is and which is not unrealistic, well…
A mix of Clark Kent and Bruce Wayne does sound nice though.

Yous a right git comin in ere wiv ya pointy ears and yer waystones and yer chariots ya poncy elf, yous in for a right crumpin ya mutt



Dats a chariot, not a namby pamby elf chariot ya filthy humie:

Just like Gork and Mork ain’t da same fing as Mork and Gork.



This conversation went awesome, fast.

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