“Let’s go loser, Bödvarr is having Southlanders in the arena, and he’s taking them all on, by himself!”
When you and your Rotblood raiding party have just finished cutting loose in the fields of Ussingen and you start hearing something approaching from beneath the wheat fields yelling GRIIIMMMNIIIIIIIRRRRRR!!!
ALL I SEE IS BLACKNESS!!!
Oh my hood’s down.
We had 2 spawn of chaos, 75 chaos warriors, 5 high-powered bile trolls, a three stashes of tainted food, a whole galaxy of multi-colored maulers, slaves, screamers, clanrats… Also, pack of blightstormers, a bale of lifeleechs, a stack of savages, a bunch of packmasters, and two gutter runners. Not that we needed all that for the campaign, but once you get locked into a serious mission, the tendency is to push it as far as you can. The only thing that really worried me was the warpstone. There is nothing in the world more helpless and irresponsible and depraved than a creature in the depths of an warpstone binge, and I knew we’d get into that rotten stuff pretty soon.
Bödvarr Ribspreader is so ugly, when he tried to join an ugly contest they said “Sorry, no professionals.”
Not funny? Your pal thought it was … staggering.
*Nurgle news live broadcast - we have Mr. Snarl Buttbreath, reporting on the latest terror attack"
… and live from Ussingen, we have this news just in. Four (or five) unknown terrorists have broken through and released several known rebels that were being held pending trial to be conducted by our Supreme leader, Bodvarr.
These 4 (or 5) terrorists must be stopped at all cost, by Nurgle they shall be made to face the supreme leader in battle. (By himself…)
We have some descriptions just in from the scene of the alleged perpetrators from witnesses:
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a moustachioed manthing (not like they are in short supply around here…) with a big sword and boomstick, was observed to scream with an unholy magical shout, by Nurgle, pushes our men to the ground!
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a senile frail looking grandmother that breathes fire
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a lost looking, skinny (but dangerous) elf that seems to have no sense of direction. Was last seen killing dear Yucktooth Snootblood’s friendly pet rat ogre in the barn, as alleged by witnesses here. We shall charge the elf with cruelty against animals crimes, by Rotfather!
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a pasty tall skinhead with a forehead tattoo and seems to enjoy getting hacked puropsefully, on several parts of his ravaged body.
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an angry short stouty shawarma salesman that seems to prove white dawis can indeed jump. It is alleged that this terrorist is responsible for 80-90% of our troops suffering donglitz injuries.
Please remember, these terrorists are considered armed and dangerous. Do not approach any by yourself, by Nurgle. If spotted, please contact your nearest Chaos Patrol or ring the bloody bell. If your local screaming bell is not available, please contact the Rotfather assistance helpline at 1-666-ROTHELP.
This is your latest news, coming at you live from the terror here in Ussingen, this is Snarl Buttbreath, reporting.
Back to you in the studio, Gurglesplooge.
When your shiny new flesh offering cares not for the gifts papa Nurgle wishes to bestow.
Marauder trying to figure out what the player means by, “Ah, yes. Enslaved temporary health points.”
when you’re on the modded realm and see 12 bardins coming and it’s too late to run
Your posse’s reaction when you realize that some white dwarves actually CAN jump!
Ol’ Nurgle brings all the boys to the farm
and they’re like, we’re gonna beat Sigmar
damn right, we’re gonna beat Sigmar
Me: Turns around to check for enemies
Behind me: Nothing
Me: Turns around literally 0.5 seconds later
“Excuse me. Do you have a moment to talk about our Rot Lord and Savior?”
When the fat midget actually starts skinning wazzoks
New DLC idea: Back to the Dentist
FatShark’s Face when someone wants to be on stream and their name doesn’t start with a “T”